This Handmade Life - Part 1 - Episode 75

In these current times when we use our hands mainly on devices, Dr. Nandita Iyer's book, This Handmade Life, really nudges us to discover or rediscover what we would like to do with our hands. In Part 1 of this 2 part series, she introduces this concept to the New Indian Woman listeners and talks about some core skills and the benefits that lie waiting for us.
 
If you would love to read more details on this episode , click here - https://www.thenewindianwoman.com/post/are-you-ready-for-handmade-life

Leaving a promising career and its impact - Part 1- Episode 73

In this episode, we meet with someone who had to leave her career due to family circumstances. She talks about how she was independent before her marriage and how she supported her family. And later, what led her to leave her wonderful career, that too when she was enjoying it and was getting recognized for it. This is Part 1 of a 2 Part series.
 
For more details on this episode, click here - https://www.thenewindianwoman.com/post/leaving-a-promising-career-and-its-impact

Figuring out my role as a Daughter in Law - Episode 65

Description
 
In Part 2 of this 2 part series, we try to figure out what this role means in day to day life and how to handle this in a way in which it doesn’t affect oneself or the overall objective. The discussion is with an avid New Indian Woman podcast listener from the USA.
 
The lady is a scientist working in the US and living in a joint family, something quite unnatural there.
 
We discuss how she decided to start writing down what she did throughout the day, as a starting point.  She shares how this triggered many thoughts and actions, which made a big difference to the quality of her daily life. You are sure to relate to many aspects of this and you may find the strategies adopted by her being effective for you as well.
 
 
Listen on ..
 
What the New Indian Woman podcast is about
 
As you may already be aware, this podcast has 2 focus areas. One, We examine the challenges faced by today's Indian woman and propose ACTIONABLE strategies in the Indian context, on a wide variety of topics - right from identifying their passion to better productivity and parenting.  Second,  we meet women who chose to aspire or have a dream beyond their defined roles  and facilitate sharing of what worked and what didn’t, for them. Today's episode falls in the first category.
 
And in the process, my aim is to help  you, The New Indian woman, to realize your potential, chase your dreams and aspirations, utilize the wonderful opportunities available in today's world.
 
What's in this episode:
 
Writing down how she spent the day, for a continuous period of time, proved difficult for her. At the same time she made immense learnings from it. What is that learning ? You will be surprised on what she found and what she decided to do about it. Would you want to do this yourself ?
 
What does it mean to come back from work and realize you have to start cooking dinner while the husband can relax around - this is a familiar story, isnt it? But would you have expected this to be the story in the US ?
She talks about the patterns we all get into, of making sure all our responsibilities are done, to the best of our abilities, so that no one around can criticize, before we are convinced to take a break. How to change this pattern? How did she do it, in a joint family, where gender roles are predefined ?
 
She moves on to talk about how she was being affected by the irritation expressed by family members over the state of the house, of the clutter and such stuff. And how, it took her some time to decide that they need to handle their irritation themselves - she need not think that she should avoid or resolve these. She shares something that really worked for her, in terms of reminding herself every day - such a small, but powerful action. This is something all of us will really find useful.
 
And again, how she decides to step out of a situation when it really becomes difficult to handle. She shares about all the questions such situations trigger in her and how she decides to acknowledge the anger she feels and tell herself it is OK to be angry. And how selfcare and having someone just to vent, is really helpful. She also shares what didn’t work for her and with professional help, how she had to adopt different techniques to handle the same.
 
And she summarizes it well by saying it is not about winning or having an upper hand over her mother in law, but about having a good and happy life. This involves a lot of give and take and clarity on which battles you really want to win.
 
I liked her take on these 2 points especially - about the daughter in law expected to bring happiness into the family and this constant question of would my in laws do this to their own daughter. You should really listen to her articulation of these 2 points.
 
And the one point she wanted to share with all listeners - Don’t forget to look after yourself!
 
Most of us may be able to relate to the above challenges in one way or the other. The reflections of the guest and the techniques that worked for her may serve as a good prompt for us and help us in our own journeys.
 
Hope you enjoy this episode. Please write to me at krishna@thenewindianwoman.com or reach out to our social media pages to share your views on this episode.
 
If you liked this episode, please help this reach more people by sharing this podcast with friends and family over Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Pinterest. Don’t forget to like our Facebook page. And please don’t forget to subscribe to the New Indian Woman Newsletter at https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Get in touch
 
Website : http://thenewindianwoman.com
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Email : krishna@thenewindianwoman.com
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LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thenewindianwoman
Newsletter: https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
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Is Daughter in Law an outsider ? - Episode 64

In Part 1 of this 2 part series, we try to answer the above question. The discussion is with an avid New Indian Woman podcast listener from the USA.
 
The lady is a scientist working in the US and living in a joint family, something quite unnatural there.
 
We examine the challenges around unstated expectations, how this can become a drain when it comes to daily living. She also shares how she sought help and what actions she took and continues to take, to make sure the home becomes a place of love, care, freedom, nurturing and more.
 
Listen on ..
 
What the New Indian Woman podcast is about
 
As you may already be aware, this podcast has 2 focus areas. One, We examine the challenges faced by today's Indian woman and propose ACTIONABLE strategies in the Indian context, on a wide variety of topics - right from identifying their passion to better productivity and parenting.  Second,  we meet women who chose to aspire or have a dream beyond their defined roles  and facilitate sharing of what worked and what didn’t, for them. Today's episode falls in the first category.
 
And in the process, my aim is to help  you, The New Indian woman, to realize your potential, chase your dreams and aspirations, utilize the wonderful opportunities available in today's world.
 
What's in this episode:
 
We start with our guest of the day talking about the concept of joint family in the US and why it is important to understand the challenges this particular aspect itself brings forth.
 
We discuss the additional burden of expectation to fit in, as a daughter in law and how this manifests in daily life. She shares a few examples of this, about certain fixed mindsets, about certain unstated expectations from the daughter in law leading to questions like when do the in laws want to be independent and when do they want help or additional care ?
 
She talks about constantly trying to watch very closely to figure out what is required vs what doesn’t work for her and what to do then. We discuss there is no such thing as we have figured out how this works and how it is a constant process. This tightrope walking leads to a lot of stress in one's daily life.
 
She talks about how she found this extremely stressful and how she decided to take professional help. She shares how they have got to a point of living in a harmonious state where there are differences, but they have learnt to navigate the waters without creating tsunamis.
 
She talks about the scenarios when for unstated reasons her mother in law would get upset and how she used to try to talk it out, apologize etc earlier. And how, after a lot of reflection, she has chosen to respond differently to the same triggers by thinking through, acknowledging and accepting her mother in laws right to have her own feelings and more importantly, there is no need to try to solve this - to believe that her mother in law can resolve her problems herself.
 
We discuss about such crucial points and the importance of being aware, of reflecting and making the choice of responding or not responding to the trigger. We also  talk about this constant overarching need to respect and love the in-laws as husband's parents  and the acknowledgement that they are not one's own parents.
 
We get into other practical techniques that she adopted and here, she starts talking about not getting time for herself in her busy schedule, caring for all and carrying out her responsibilities in her various roles.
 
Most of us may be able to relate to the above challenges in one way or the other. The reflections of the guest and the techniques that worked for her may serve as a good prompt for us and help us in our own journeys.
 
Hope you enjoy this episode. Please write to me at krishna@thenewindianwoman.com or reach out to our social media pages to share your views on this episode.
 
If you liked this episode, please help this reach more people by sharing this podcast with friends and family over Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Pinterest. Don’t forget to like our Facebook page. And please don’t forget to subscribe to the New Indian Woman Newsletter at https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Get in touch
 
Website : http://thenewindianwoman.com
Facebook : http://facebook.com/newindianwoman
Email : krishna@thenewindianwoman.com
Twitter : https://twitter.com/thenewindianwo1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thenewindianwoman
Newsletter: https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Subscribe
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Living with your Mother in Law ? - Episode 63

In this episode, we explore the Mother in law relationship, through the eyes of a few women. Is it as difficult as it is portrayed to be ? What is special about a woman and her mother in law's interactions - why so much talk about it ?
 
I speak to women across various age groups and profiles probing a few questions - What are the top challenges faced by them ?
 
At the end of this episode, you may want to ask some of these questions to yourself.
 
Listen on ..
 
What the New Indian Woman podcast is about
 
As you may already be aware, this podcast has 2 focus areas. One, We examine the challenges faced by today's Indian woman and propose ACTIONABLE strategies in the Indian context, on a wide variety of topics - right from identifying their passion to better productivity and parenting.  Second,  we meet women who chose to aspire or have a dream beyond their defined roles  and facilitate sharing of what worked and what didn’t, for them. Today's episode falls in the first category.
 
And in the process, my aim is to help  you, The New Indian woman, to realize your potential, chase your dreams and aspirations, utilize the wonderful opportunities available in today's world.
 
What's in this episode:
 
Why is a relationship with a woman's mother in law different ? What are the top challenges faced by women ? And, do these challenges change over a period of time ? What has or hasn’t worked ?
 
What could be the other perspectives from which this relationship can be examined ?
 
While open communication always scores high in all relationship issues, what about the so many things that cannot be talked about ?
 
What are the top things that you would ask your mother in law to stop doing or start doing ? What about the things you will start or stop doing to her ?
 
The answers shared in the episode will surprise you.
 
We move on to questions around having third person to help examine issues in an objective manner and the importance of the same.
 
And then, the very difficult question around seeing the mother in law as a separate person and to highlight her admirable qualities.
 
These discussions are intended to let us understand and appreciate these perspectives. Plus, these should be prompts for us to examine our own context.
 
Hope you enjoy this episode. Please write to me at krishna@thenewindianwoman.com or reach out to our social media pages to share your views on this episode.
 
If you liked this episode, please help this reach more people by sharing this podcast with friends and family over Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Pinterest. Don’t forget to like our Facebook page. And please don’t forget to subscribe to the New Indian Woman Newsletter at https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Get in touch
 
Website : http://thenewindianwoman.com
Facebook : http://facebook.com/newindianwoman
Email : krishna@thenewindianwoman.com
Twitter : https://twitter.com/thenewindianwo1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thenewindianwoman
Newsletter: https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Subscribe
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Are there gender based roles at home ? - Episode 61

In this episode, we explore how our day to day activities are influenced by our gender. Not at workplace, but in our own homes. Broadly we may be aware of what is the primary role each family member is playing in the house. Many fall into the area of shared responsibilities. But still, are there things you do in your house only because you are a woman ?
 
You may wonder why this question should be examined. It is very easy to talk about equality at workplace, equality everywhere. But what about our own families ? Are you aware if gender influences what you do ? We may all be aware of the undue load of invisible work on the woman - managing home and a job, taking care of the children or elderly and what not. Quite often, we may think we have distributed the responsibilities in our own homes and it is a fair game. But, is it ?
 
I speak to women across various age groups and profiles probing a few questions - whether there is a gender based distribution of work at home ? What is the one thing they would want out of their plate, if they had an option - the one thing that is on them because of being a woman ? What is it they expect from their family or extended family members  in terms of better understanding the additional responsibilities carried out as a woman ?
 
At the end of this episode, you may want to ask some of these questions to yourself. Why ?
 
Listen on ..
 
What the New Indian Woman podcast is about
 
As you may already be aware, this podcast has 2 focus areas. One, We examine the challenges faced by today's Indian woman and propose ACTIONABLE strategies in the Indian context, on a wide variety of topics - right from identifying their passion to better productivity and parenting.  Second,  we meet women who chose to aspire or have a dream beyond their defined roles  and facilitate sharing of what worked and what didn’t, for them. Today's episode falls in the first category.
 
And in the process, my aim is to help  you, The New Indian woman, to realize your potential, chase your dreams and aspirations, utilize the wonderful opportunities available in today's world.
 
What's in this episode:
 
Same questions, posed to women of different age groups, profiles and life stages. It is interesting to see some things common, affecting every woman. It is also interesting to see how perspectives differ and sometimes, how the seemingly smallest of things can be such a big bother for them.
 
One important common observation for me was about how this question was new for all of them - most of them started stating there are no gender based roles, yes, in their own ways. But when probed further. One could make out they were shouldering additional home maintenance responsibilities just because they are women. Sometime there was almost a denial, stating what is done is based on who is skilled at what. And sometimes, there was just plain acceptance, resigning to the fact this is how it is going to be.
 
It would be very interesting to ask these questions to yourself and openly, without any bias or any attempts to defend, examine your feelings towards this. You may even want to examine a list of what all you do. You may think there is no point in examining this, but do remember, there are or will be children around you, who will imbibe this and accept this as the default. So, you examining these questions and talking about it, as always, would be a good starting point.
 
There is an interesting article on this topic, albeit in the western contex.t I am not sure of the solution proposed in this context, but I feel it is a good read. This is about a lady who came up with a Shit I do excel and realized it is huge, she came up with this when she felt there was a huge amount of invisible work done by her - https://www.fastcompany.com/90419266/this-game-can-help-you-divide-household-duties-and-emotional-labor-fairly#:~:text=As%20Rodsky%20began%20to%20mull,provider%20was%20taking%20its%20toll.
 
These discussions are intended to let us understand and appreciate these perspectives. Plus, these should be prompts for us to examine our own context.
 
Hope you enjoy this episode. Please write to me at krishna@thenewindianwoman.com or reach out to our social media pages to share your views on this episode.
 
If you liked this episode, please help this reach more people by sharing this podcast with friends and family over Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Pinterest. Don’t forget to like our Facebook page. And please don’t forget to subscribe to the New Indian Woman Newsletter at https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Get in touch
 
Website : http://thenewindianwoman.com
Facebook : http://facebook.com/newindianwoman
Email : krishna@thenewindianwoman.com
Twitter : https://twitter.com/thenewindianwo1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thenewindianwoman
Newsletter: https://newindianwoman.substack.com/
 
Subscribe
Use the link corresponding to your favourite Podcast App to listen to the latest episode and do not forget to click on Subscribe :
 
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Introduction to Homeschooling with Pranuti Satyadass - Episode 60

Homeschooling is not about children doing online schooling from home. Well, what is it exactly ? In this episode, we meet Pranuti Satyadass, who has experience in homeschooling her kids and who guides other parents in this journey.
 
If you already know about homeschooling, this episode will help clarify more. We explore several questions around the benefits, challenges and what it takes to homeschool your children.
 
This is a very important topic that you, as a New Indian Woman, would benefit from knowing about, even if you think this topic is not relevant for you.
 
So, listen on..
 
What the New Indian Woman podcast is about
 
As you may already be aware, this podcast has 2 focus areas. One, We examine the challenges faced by today's Indian woman and propose ACTIONABLE strategies in the Indian context, on a wide variety of topics - right from identifying their passion to better productivity and parenting.  Second,  we meet women who chose to aspire or have a dream beyond their defined roles  and facilitate sharing of what worked and what didn’t, for them. Today's episode falls in the first category.
 
And in the process, my aim is to help  you, The New Indian woman, to realize your potential, chase your dreams and aspirations, utilize the wonderful opportunities available in today's world.
 
What's in this episode:
 
Pranuti starts with explaining what homeschooling really means, with parents being the main facilitators and in charge of their children's education with the children not being affiliated to any institute.
 
We get into the typical trigger points for parents opting for homeschooling for their children. Pranuti talks about the top 2 reasons for her - to focus on the strengths of her children and to ensure they spend a lot of time with each other. She also shares the other reasons why parents typically take up this decision.
 
She talks about using one's resources in the best way possible for one's children - in terms of time, money, engagement and energy.
 
Pranuti goes on to share about how this is generally perceived by people who are not aware of homeschooling and how the situation has improved over the past decade, but it still remains a bold step.
 
Pranuti then discusses the top questions asked by parents, be it around the board exams, about future prospects and social life and goes on to dispel the myths around each of these.
 
We then discuss about how a typical day would be and how by lunch time the academics part of the day is over!
 
We get on to discuss the challenges around doing this when both parents are working and even examine the feasibility of homeschooling. She then clarifies how one can talk about conventional schooling vs homeschooling, how the parent becomes more knowledgeable during this journey and how the parent facilitates the involvement of tutors as required and how the parent's focus on finding a way out keeping the child's best interests, helps.
 
When it comes to older children, we examine some of the techniques required to handle their aspirations, be it in terms of trying out conventional schooling and helping them with decision making and being accountable. We also discuss when would be the best time to start homeschooling.
 
Pranuti then shares the number of homeschoolers in a city like Bangalore and how this is catching up across India.
 
Pranuti poses a set of very valid questions that should help us think through, for the sake of the children in our lives.
 
Hope you enjoyed knowing more about home schooling.
 
Please write to me at krishna@thenewindianwoman.com or reach out to our social media pages to share your views on this episode.
 
If you liked this episode, please help this reach more people by sharing this podcast with friends and family over Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Pinterest. Don’t forget to like our Facebook page.
 
Get in touch
 
Website : http://thenewindianwoman.com
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Email : krishna@thenewindianwoman.com
Twitter : https://twitter.com/thenewindianwo1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thenewindianwoman
 
To Connect with the guest
 
Email: pranubunyan@gmail.com
Video referred to in the podcast: https://www.vigeo.in/post/homeschooling
 
 
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Prof. Jayanthasri - for Women in their 40s and above

The final part of this 3 part series with Prof. Jayanthasri Balakrishnan is for the woman who is having older children who may suddenly feel redundant in their lives. In Part 1, i.e. episode 57, we examined questions pertaining to women in their 20s to 30s and in Part 2, we focused upon women in their 30s to 40s.
 
If you haven't heard about the very popular Prof, Jayanthasri Balakrishnan, I am very happy for this podcast to introduce her and her thoughts to you!
 
We talk a lot about parenting of a different kind, where parenting as a primary responsibility comes down and the need for women to adapt to this phase in life. Dr. Jayanthasri guides us for this phase of life with very simple examples.
 
 
So, listen on..
 
What the New Indian Woman podcast is about
 
As you may already be aware, this podcast has 2 focus areas. One, We examine the challenges faced by today's Indian woman and propose ACTIONABLE strategies in the Indian context, on a wide variety of topics - right from identifying their passion to better productivity and parenting.  Second,  we meet women who chose to aspire or have a dream beyond their defined roles  and facilitate sharing of what worked and what didn’t, for them. Today's episode falls in the second category.
 
And in the process, my aim is to help  you, The New Indian woman, to realize your potential, chase your dreams and aspirations, utilize the wonderful opportunities available in today's world.
 
What's in this episode:
 
 
Dr. Jayanthasri starts off with how we all learnt cycling without the side wheels, but how we have become the side wheels for our children, creating a lot of noise! She highlights the importance of teaching them how to go.
 
She conveys the importance of having parenting as an important chapter in the book of our life, but without that being the only chapter.
 
She says distancing ourselves from our children is the best we can do for them. It is important for them to make mistakes, but to know that we, as parents, are there for them.  They should feel confident about that, about being able to come back to the parents, not with a sense of guilt, but with a sense of apology.
 
She talks about how, as a parent, you can be absent and can still make the child feel your presence. She also conveys the need for parents to understand the role of a custodian vs being a controller.
 
Then we start talk about renewing the relationship with the partner, wherein Dr. Jayanthasri, talks about the importance of nurturing it throughout one's life. She narrates a few examples from her life, where the challenges of daily life seemed to raise many issues and the kind of help and perspective she received and how these are important in a relationship.
 
As we wind up, she shares the biggest virtue, its not about Forgive and Forget, but something much more, to lead a satisfied life, with its ups and downs.
 
I enjoyed interacting with her and listening to her inputs across the various life stages. How about you ?
 
Please write to me at krishna@thenewindianwoman.com or reach out to our social media pages to share your views on this episode.
 
If you liked this episode, please help this reach more people by sharing this podcast with friends and family over Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Pinterest. Don’t forget to like our Facebook page.
 
Get in touch
 
Website : http://thenewindianwoman.com
Facebook : http://facebook.com/newindianwoman
Email : krishna@thenewindianwoman.com
Twitter : https://twitter.com/thenewindianwo1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thenewindianwoman
 
To Connect with the guest
 
LinkedIn: https://in.linkedin.com/in/jayanthasri-balakrishnan-a8845734
Twitter: https://twitter.com/jayanthasribal1
Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/JayanthasriOfficial
 
 
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